Current location:	same as always
Current mood:	bitchy
Current music:	air. silence except for the 4 and a half foot lizard strolling around the room.
Entry tags:	blog

long time no write. lol
It's been a long time since I've confided in this journal. I think its about time I pick it up again. *sigh* things have been a little stressful lately. the main reason I'm writing today.

I guess first I can start with my parents. I love them to death, but my mom and dad are getting on my nerves. I don't know what happened, but apparently my mom's credit card that I use for gas came back with a $200 payment for one month. Now, I can almost understand if I was like trailing around without thinking. Driving everywhere possible, but I wasn't. I was going from school home everyday. The only time I ever vired off that course was to by crickets for my pet which is a necessity! and that isn't even that far off course! so, I don't know. I don't know if my mom is exagerating again about how much my car spends on gas even though it gets like the same gas milage as my old car which, mind you, is like 30 miles to the gallon if I'm driving right! which, I'm a safe driver and all. I don't take off fast, I don't speed and...I just don't know. I really don't know what my parents want from me. I don't do anything behind their backs, I'm searching for job even though its driving me nuts cause I've put in like 10 applications and updated them for months without any calls back! I do my best to save gas even though I live a good 45 minutes away from my school! I don't know what else they want from me? would they be more happy if I was one of those pissy teenagers that say "I hate my f****** parents" everywhere I go and dress in black clothes and get into fights with them over the littlest things? I just really don't know any more.

And wait, there's more....

I have the biggest project of my high school education rolling closer and closer. It's a presentation...FUN!! I appsolutely hate presentations!! And to top it all off its in front of a panel of people I've never even met who are complete experts in the field I'm going to be talking about! It's some freakin crap. it really is. I don't know what to do. I'm so freakin stressed out right now I don't even know. I don't feel well and I keep snapping cause i feel like crap and I'm so freakin stressed. I just have no idea what to do. I'm not going to say I want to die or anything cause I don't. I have a good life other then this stress. my family does love me and I have a loving and understanding boyfriend who I intend to marry. but I just don't know what to do right now. I feel outrageously stressed. and I told myself i would try not to be stressed this year. not working. *sigh* well, that's all I can really say without repeating myself, which no one wants to hear.

This is zafrand, closing yet another useless post and hoping that I can restart hidden wolf, midnight wolf and my actual private story one of these days. which i've been so meaning to do. its been like a year, but no one really knows how my life has changed through this past year. things are a little different. I'm not the girl who can sit around home all day and do nothing. anyways, ttyl peoples! bye.